Review #81: The Curse of La Llorona (2019)


This review was originally written in October 2019.

October Horror Movie Review #29: The Curse of La Llorona

I'm afraid I'm not really going to have a lot to say about this film; the only word I can think to describe the experience was "forgettable". This movie never really "grabbed" me, from the moment it started until the moment it ended. There were a few spots where it felt like it was getting interesting- when Raymond Cruz got into the mix it definitely started to perk up a bit- but every time that happened, a few minutes later it would start to spiral into a lull and then lose me again.

I guess I'll give a synopsis. Linda Caredllini plays a social worker named Anna who has to take a mother into custody after this woman (seemingly) kills her own kids; she claims an evil spirit called La Llorona killed them as part of some ghost habit, but nobody believes her. But then when Anna's kids start coming under attack by some sort of evil specter, Anna has to seek help from an ex-priest who knows the legend of this ghost.

Now, La Llorona is an old folk tale- it wasn't made up for this film- and part of me wonders if maybe, had I never heard of the tale of La Llorona I might have been a bit more interested in this film. I doubt that's the case- I've watched plenty of movies about existing stories and they were no more or less inherently boring than this one- I'm pretty sure the fault here lies entirely on the shoulders of the filmmakers. The cast are all forgettable, none of them are particularly good actors, and the action just never felt tense or interesting. I saw every plot point and jump scare from miles away, and this movie didn't tread new ground in any way whatsoever. And because this is based on a known tale (which, itself, has dozens of variations) it falls into the same trap so many other horror movies do: Of all of the conflicting accounts about who this ghost is and how to defeat her, the protagonists just happen to meet the ONE person who knows the ONE way to defeat her, and it works without a hitch. I guess this movie takes place in an alternate universe where folk tales are 100% accurate and never evolve over time and culture.

This movie was forgettable and I don't recommend watching it. You might be tempted to watch this after hearing that it takes place in the same continuity as The Conjuring, but if anything this movie brings that entire series down quite a bit.

Overall Rating: 2/10

My Personal Headcanon: Rafael quit exorcising demons and began selling meth after the events of this film

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