Review #331: Heart Eyes (2025)
October 2025 Holiday Horror Review #4 - Heart Eyes (2025)
[Special note from the writer: this review is, appropriately, going out on my wedding anniversary! I've spent 17 years married to the love of my life and wouldn't trade it for the world.]
Heart Eyes is a Romantic-Comedy-Horror film about a rash of murders committed by the Heart Eyes Killer, who goes on a rampage in a new city every Valentine's Day, specifically targeting couples celebrating the holiday. Our main protagonist, Ally, is currently single, but when she runs into her ex while out with a coworker, she feigns romance and attracts the attention of the serial killer. What follows is a delightful romp full of witty dialogue, creative special effects, effective scares, and some fun twists and turns along the way.
I first saw this movie back around when it came out (Valentine's Day of this year)- I enjoyed it enough the first time around, so I wasn't particularly excited to revisit it so soon after my first viewing. But on this rewatch I noticed so many details I didn't notice before- I don't really want to spoil anything so I won't give specifics, but I'll just say that once you know the true nature of the killer, a lot of the dialogue and plotting of the movie has extra levels of intention that you wouldn't have noticed otherwise. It really added a lot to the experience that I wasn't expecting, for what otherwise could have ended up feeling like a cheesy romcom/horror-comedy.
I don't really have a ton else to say about this movie (it was pretty good, you should watch it, maybe even watch it twice) so I'll take this opportunity to mention a couple tropes that pop up in this film that really kind of annoy me. First is something I noticed in both this movie and The Substance (another great film), and I'm sure it's been in many others: when someone has an abusive boss that's threatening to fire them over something they can't control, yet the "victory" at the end of the film has them earning their boss' favor and now they're happy because they have the job they had at the start of the film. If your boss is literally threatening to kill you because your ad campaign flopped (as is the case in this film), why is your end goal to win that boss' favor? Go get a job somewhere else. Find a boss that isn't insulting you in front of the entire company. Maybe this is just one of those tropes that exists because that's how it really is in Hollywood- the industry is so toxic, no matter how awful your boss is there's no option but to placate them- but like, how relatable is that to the average moviegoer? What percentage of the world lives in Hollywood? It's hard to consider it a victory when the protagonist is happy they're back with the abusive boss.
The other trope is when the characters always expect the killer to be someone they know or recognize. There's a point in this movie (I'll try not to spoil anything) where the killer's mask comes off and the two protagonists look at each other and go, "Who the hell is that?" But like... why would they expect to know who it was? This killer has been terrorizing cities across the country for years. This is the kind of trope that screams "this is a fictional story, therefore we are expected to conserve detail" and when made blatant really pulls me out of the story.
Anyway, enough complaining about tropes, this is a great movie. Go check it out.
Overall Rating: 9/10 Church Statues Holding Swords At Neck Level
Easter Egg References: According to IMDB, when Monica and Ally shop for clothes, Ally's clothes reference other romantic comedies. Her first outfit with the hat is Stacey Dash's from Clueless, the dress with the collar is Julia Roberts' night outfit from Pretty Woman, and then she and Monica wear the colored dresses from Romy and Michele's High School Reunion.
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